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My cooking rules:
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Don’t
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eat ingredients out of their packages instead
(pouring salt and chili peppers down my throats)
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What if I’ve got a perfectly smoked butt that’s just begging to be shredded?
Fair. That’s how the majority of food borne illnesses occurs.
What if it’s a turkey?
Don’t put your hands in your butt.
Oh… Um…
how to remove stuffing from own butt
Get one cup. And two girls.
Instructions unclear. Got a jar instead.
Push it (out). Push it real good.
Oh. Yeah
You can stick the turkey in your butt, just as long as you don’t put your hands in there.
I think you better ask about the rest of his rules
It is now!
