My wife and I are going to a concert in a few months which is considered ‘girl pop’ and we have standing tickets. I wanted to get a look at what a show by this artist is like, so I search YouTube just to find it’s a bunch of young adult woman screaming anytime something is done like a dance move as an example, but this just isn’t me.
I have a worry that someone is going to start filming me for being ‘grumpy’ or whatever, usually I wouldn’t think this much into it, but I’m already going to be sticking out like a sore thumb and in the current year I always assume I’m in the background of someone’s video at any given moment and I don’t want my awkwardness being confused for anything else other than what it is.
Am I in over my head, or should I just not overthink it and try to enjoy myself?
I’m also in my 30s. I’ve been to a bunch of “girly” concerts with my wife and have had a great time at all of them.
It’s much easier to enjoy life when you let go of notions of what you should or should not be enjoying. Music doesn’t need to be gendered. You can just enjoy it for what it is.
In fact, I’d extend the idea to countless other facets of life: there’s so much pointless gendering in society that does a huge disservice to everyone, men included. I’ll give you a dumb example: I used to hold the notion in my younger years that if I were given a purse to hold, that I had to hold the purse in such a way to telegraph that it wasn’t actually my purse. Like grasp it like some kind of ape man or something. Like… What is the fucking point in that? It’s so goddamn dumb and childish. Now I often take turns holding my wife’s purse (it can be a bit heavy because it also doubles as a diaper bag for our toddler) and don’t give a single fuck about doing so.
I can give you countless other examples where I was raised with incredibly damaging ideas ultimately stemming from toxic masculinity that I have painstakingly excised from my psyche.
One of my favorite things about getting older is that I give less of a shit about anyone else’s opinion, every year. When you’re 40, you’re gonna laugh at how worked up you got about this.
If you go and decide you like it then explore other girly things too.
Fuck gender norms, do whatever sounds interesting.
You’re going with your wife. She’s your human Teflon.
As a single adult man any space not specifically targeted to you will draw heat and dirty looks. With a wife and/or kids to hide behind the world is yours for the taking.
Enjoy yourself, have fun with your wife, and don’t overhtink-it, your dick won’t fly away
Dammit, won’t be able to make an insurance claim now
Eh, what would $24.99 do for your bank account anyway?
Bring me up to - £11.88
Excellent jib, sir, particularly the cut.
Own it or stay home. By owning it, I mean just enjoy yourself & I guarantee all is good. I can’t say the same about the demographics of the fan base. People are people and just do your best, don’t assume anything , be kind & direct when speaking & just present the best you.
Guy over 30 here. I went to a PVRIS concert recently, and apparently the singer is a LGBT icon. Also the opener was Scene Queen. I definitely didn’t fit into the demographic, but I didn’t feel like I was sticking out either.
It was an awesome concert. IMO you’re overthinking it. Just have fun.
and apparently the singer is a LGBT icon.
Anyone who sees this and doesn’t immediately go “oh they’re gay as fuck” needs to replace the batteries in their gaydar:
Oh, new batteries won’t help. Mine is completely busted.
You are overthinking it. Just enjoy yourself and take ear protection — besides the concert being loud, teenage girls scream really loud.
You’ll be among the pool of husbands and dads who also had to go. Enjoy not waiting for the bathroom the whole concert.
But yes, you are overthinking it. Go have fun and do what you do naturally. Maybe you don’t have to constantly be giddy every second for 2 hours.
I have a friend that flew from Vancouver to Toronto to see Black Pink… alone … as a 30ish white man. You should be fine
I just reached my mid-40s, and at the same time, I realized that I have been overthinking everything. Nobody cares, and those that do, you shouldn’t care about. Too many missed opportunities because I thought it worried too much and did too little. I think my new outlook may have been influenced by the ever increasing deaths of people around me. Time keeps speeding up, I’ll be dead soon. So will everyone. Do whatever you want, be nice to people, it’ll all be over too soon.
They would never film you if they think you’re grumpy, because they’re hired by the venue, the labels and artists, and it would be considered bad PR for them.
The cameras ususually only catch the front rows anyways, and the concert is way different and more relaxed when you arent in the mosh pit.
You’re also going there to enjoy it, in contrast to the parents that just go there because of their children, that will likely look way more grumpy than you.
Put on your shortest shorts, ask your wife to do your makeup, and dance like no one is watching.
You are overthinking it. No one cares. Just do what you have to do.
The people who judge will be out of sight in a few hours but the regret of not going will be with you till you die.
I have a worry that someone is going to start filming me for being ‘grumpy’ or whatever
Embrace your future memetic fame
