Anything I’ve bought at a sports stadium. The FootyScran twitter account catalogues some similar examples -
That’s straight up disrespectful
Looks like a euro burger on a US bun.
Oh… I’m so sorry. That should be illegal.
Did they scrape that off the bottom of one of the seats?
The FootyScran twitter account catalogues some similar examples
Relevant daily game: scrandle.
There’s a local grocery store chain here that has the most bland tasting everything in their prepared food counter. You’ve never eaten such tasteless food in your life. Poor seasoning? Try none at all. Everything tastes like cardboard.
Want to simulate what it’s like to eat food as a 30 year long habitual chain smoker, shop at Freson Bros.
Kellogg would cum his pants on the spot discovering such blandness could exist.
Their potato salad gave me depression. I didn’t know you could make a calzone taste like the box it came in.
I am weirdly intrigued. You make it sound like a curiosity
I seem to write better when I’m passionate about something. What gets me is none of it looks* off/shitty visually. Like the coleslaw looks appealing until you eat a mouth full and wish to die from your utter disappointment. If the Demiurge is real, one of his angels runs their kitchen just to fuck with people.
Or Famine, one of the horsemen of the apocalypse. Make food that looks good but doesn’t feed anyone, made of sawdust and wax.
I need to try this now
I actually like the taste of unseasoned food.
Couple months ago I got a tonsillectomy. I got nerve damage in my tongue as a side effect of a tool they used and everything tastes different since. Tomato based pasta sauces have been the absolute worst, it tastes very metallic. The only normal type of food I can stand is Asian food that isn’t breaded/fried.
LOL, 80% of our home cooked meals either have tomatoes and/or fried Asian food. :)
Ordered indian takeout from a place in thr UK. The butter chicken tasted like they cooked a frozen chicken breast and strained a can of Spaghetti Os sauce over it.
Either live octopus or raw stingray. The former is chopped up and dipped in spicy sauce to make it writhe. The latter absolutely reeks of piss (stingrays are full of ammonia apparently). Silkworm larva are surprisingly delicious.
I think rays are one of those animals that urinate through their skin, like sharks
That would explain the smell and the taste. The one upside to this is that stingray meat never really goes “bad”. It pickles itself. Which as I understand it is the reason people started eating it despite the awfulness.
Surprising strategy, but why not…
I can’t have octopus ever since I watched My Octopus Teacher. But am fine with squid
Apparently none y’all have tried vegemite.
Come at me Australia!
Vegemite tastes like what I imagine the under-side of a cow to taste. It tastes like the smell of road surface. It should have a warning label: Not to be taken orally. It’s clearly a prank that Australia plays with everyone.
Also, I was born in England, but have lived in Australia for 25 years.
Don’t forget Marmite. I can eat that straight out of the bottle. Yum.
🤮
Funny thing is, I hate 98% of all vegetables. They literally make me ill. But I can eat marmite all day long. Go figure.
Vegemite is just brewers yeast post-brew, with added salt. It’s was invented to use up the leftover brewers yeast after brewing beer (well really, Marmite was, and Vegemite was invented as an Australian version of Marmite).
Brits like the taste of beer, Brits made Marmite. Aussies like the taste of beer… Vegemite.
Its ok if yanks don’t like the taste of beer, we get it, we’ve tried your beers.
I tried it as a kid when my school had some kind of international day and lunch was a catered buffet of tons of different food from around the world.
It was basicslly pure salt on my tastebuds.
Chick-fil-A. Soggy, rubbery chicken. So fucking gross.
I have had some truley awful CFA sandwiches. When they are good they are fine. But Everytime I go to one it is really hit or miss. So why bother?
When I was in my twenties I met this girl. I got really sick, and she wanted to impress me and made soup. She knew nothing about cooking.
She boiled a chicken, did not separate anything. Chopped up a head of parsley and threw it in.
Then she served it to me with glistening eyes and a hopeful look. “I want you to feel better, I made soup for you”.
It was just basically grey chicken fat with bones, cartilage, skin floating in it.
Was your sickness related to your soap eating?
No that only lasted until I was about 10 years old
Did you poop bubbles?
you’re becoming annoying at this point
Aaaaand blocked
I grew up hating a lot of vegetables because my grandfather - who I’m sure meant well - used to boil the life out of them. Green beans or broccoli would be soft, mushy, and greyish (while the water became green), and taste like unseasoned sadness.
One day when I was in grade school in the year nineteen eighty-bad, the cafeteria served hot dogs which had gone greyish and we were all told it was fine. They smelled awful and made a bunch of kids sick.
I made pancakes once. I didn’t know the difference between baking powder and baking soda. It tasted like chewing aluminum foil or licking a 9v battery.
I’m generally not allowed in the kitchen.
This is why the correct way to make pancakes is from a box.
Preferably with applesauce instead of egg, but you do you.
Sea urchin sushi.
Thoroughly unrecommended.
It was like someone boiled the souls of a thousand fish down into a paste and then let it ferment underground for a year. I was not prepared.
For the record it was part of a set multi course meal in a fancy Japanese restaurant - I didn’t seek it out in particular.
Strange. I’ve only been able to have it once. I found it to be buttery, with a mild taste, about as fishy as salmon. I really enjoyed it.
Maybe there was a translation issue, but there were a dozen or more of us at the dinner and almost all of us found it unpalatable. A couple asked ‘what the last dish we had was’ when the next dish came out and were told it was sea urchin.
Did some searching, apparently it can be variable in taste due to sea urchin diet, freshness, and preparation. There are commercially prepared pastes that aren’t very palatable.
The urchin I had was really expensive and was a special that was rarely available. This sushi place had very good stuff, you could also order freshly grated wasabi from imported Japanese roots (I totally recommend).
Probably similar to canned crab vs fresh crab. Stuff in the can is terrible and I don’t know how people eat it.
It’s almost always due to freshness and diet. Freshly caught and cracked sea urchin is pretty mild and like any other seafood, starts to get stankier by the second.
Unripe persimmon. I can’t even say it has a flavor, more a sensation of your face trying to implode into your mouth. Bitterness is an insufficient descriptor for it. That’s part of it, but also your mouth feels dry in a way that defies belief. It’s like being stuck on the dentist’s vacuum too long.
Indeed, it’s not really a flavor, but that sensation is called astringent.
That’s the skin. The fruit is sweet as honey.
The fruit is incredibly astringent when unripe.
almost ate raccoon that dads friend caught in traps.
Tête de veau and andouillettes.
I’ll try everything once but the first is just jelly with cartilage, reminding you it used to be a face.
The second is offal sausage that smells like the intestines weren’t washed out properly.
Oh
Headcheese?
Do people still buy it? Damn. Only old people did when I worked deli, and that’s long enough ago that they’re all dead.
Nope, looked it up. Similar though.
I ordered andouillette in a Paris restaurant once not knowing what it was. I had a little dictionary with me (pre-internet) that translated it as “chitterlings”. I didn’t know what that was either.
Never again - it had chopped-up bits of rubbery guts on it that resisted chewing, it was vile.
A good andouillette is fantastic, but I understand how it would sneak up on the unprepared foodie
I love haggis, and that’s all horrible bits and pieces cooked in a sheep stomach. No rubbery chunks though. I’ll give andouillette another whirl next time I’m in Paris, maybe I got a dud.
It’s supposed to be from Troyes, in case you happen to be in the vicinity… I’ve yet to try haggis but I’m optimistic, looks right up my alley
Two things. Once I had fish in the student cafeteria that gave me food poisoning. Since then, I can’t stand fish and seafood anymore.
The other was a lasagne I had at a Tesco cafe. I took one bite, and returned it to the counter, stating that this is the worst lasagne that ever happened to me.
