Gotta wonder how much of this is the result of getting married in high school, when you’re immature and horny and press ganged into the first person you sleep with.
In my experience, people who date around in their teens/twenties and find someone later in life tend to feel happier and more settled. By contrast, folks married at adolescence grow out of love, get divorced, and then do crazy rumspringa stuff into their 30s/40s in an attempt to recapture their youth.
The rate of divorce is strongly associated with the age the relationship started at.
Two 18-20 year olds while still barely adults have a very low chance of being successful. Once they reach 24-25 the rate of divorce declines dramatically. By then they are usually making adult-ish decisions.
I feel like kids are pressured to much to find love and get married before they’re even sure what love is. Not sure if this is an unpopular opinion, but we gotta stop telling kids that true love is a feeling or that “they’ll know it when they find it.”
In actuality, you can never be sure a relationship will succeed or if it’s “true” love. Real “true” love isn’t just a feeling, is the result of an already successful relationship. It’s when you make it for years and years and have had time to grow together and you find that you’ve been able to grow with each other enough to have confidence that it’s going to continue to work.
When you teach kids to rely only on their feelings and not look at things objectively, every love starts to look like true love to them, trapping themself in a relationship, even when they end up hating their partner, which when everyone’s doing it just becomes the norm, never questioning if things could be better.
It’s not necessarily a good thing in context, though, as it may skew perception to know one personal data point as opposed to all the impersonal data points of an overall trend. People tend to put more importance on personal anecdotes, even if it has the same basic value as any other data point.
Gotta wonder how much of this is the result of getting married in high school, when you’re immature and horny and press ganged into the first person you sleep with.
In my experience, people who date around in their teens/twenties and find someone later in life tend to feel happier and more settled. By contrast, folks married at adolescence grow out of love, get divorced, and then do crazy rumspringa stuff into their 30s/40s in an attempt to recapture their youth.
The rate of divorce is strongly associated with the age the relationship started at.
Two 18-20 year olds while still barely adults have a very low chance of being successful. Once they reach 24-25 the rate of divorce declines dramatically. By then they are usually making adult-ish decisions.
I feel like kids are pressured to much to find love and get married before they’re even sure what love is. Not sure if this is an unpopular opinion, but we gotta stop telling kids that true love is a feeling or that “they’ll know it when they find it.”
In actuality, you can never be sure a relationship will succeed or if it’s “true” love. Real “true” love isn’t just a feeling, is the result of an already successful relationship. It’s when you make it for years and years and have had time to grow together and you find that you’ve been able to grow with each other enough to have confidence that it’s going to continue to work.
When you teach kids to rely only on their feelings and not look at things objectively, every love starts to look like true love to them, trapping themself in a relationship, even when they end up hating their partner, which when everyone’s doing it just becomes the norm, never questioning if things could be better.
for what its worth, my grandparents got married right out of HS, and nearly 80 years later they’re still together.
It’s not a universal rule, but it is a trend.
Trends are not absolute. Just because something is statistically more likely does not mean it is guaranteed.
while true, one more data point is never a bad thing to know.
It’s not necessarily a good thing in context, though, as it may skew perception to know one personal data point as opposed to all the impersonal data points of an overall trend. People tend to put more importance on personal anecdotes, even if it has the same basic value as any other data point.