Honestly it’s a long story but I got a bunch of red flags. It’s not that I don’t like him but I am just very suspicious.

For me the worst part is that he seems emotionally unavailable. Like he takes so long to respond all the time I honestly think he is seeing other people (if he doesn’t have a wife and kids already, lol).

Last time we saw each other he said we should grab a bite to eat sometime but he hasn’t messaged me at all since then, and I’m realizing this is kind of a pattern with him.

I feel like either he isn’t that interested in me, or … I mean that’s pretty much the only option tbh

So I should just cut him off, right? I mean if he ever does message me I bet it’ll be days from now…

Maybe I’m just too clingy but either way, I don’t think we’re compatible in that case. I’m not used to men being this distant tbh. Usually when I go on a date the guy wants to lock things in really fast and like… cares about maintaining my interest

Edit: in case he does eventually reach out, how can I decline while letting him know why (not cause I didn’t like him but because he doesn’t seem present enough)? Or is it better to just not respond or block him?

I’m mostly worried he will catch me when I’m lonely and then I will make the horrible decision of seeing him again

  • TTH4P@lemm.eeEnglish
    15·
    3 days ago

    I mean, if someone is making you feel this way then that’s a dealbreaker, no matter what’s going on of their end.

    • jlyndby@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
      2·
      3 days ago

      If he does eventually ask me to hang out again, is there something I should say to make it seem like it’s his fault for being a jerk and not the fact that I wasn’t attracted to him? Or do you think it’s pointless?

      • papelitofeliz@lemmy.worldEnglish
        2·
        2 days ago

        I don’t think he is being a jerk necessarily. it’s just incompatibility and a perfectly valid reason to end the relationship.

        • jlyndby@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
          1·
          2 days ago

          Idk I’ve literally never had a somewhat normal guy do that… one was a legit sociopath who was really cruel and evil … like just ghosting for days I’ve always had problems with

          The other was extremely bipolar and took me through the worst rollercoaster relationship ever where the whole time he was “unsure” about me

      • TTH4P@lemm.eeEnglish
        4·
        3 days ago

        I think your efforts and attentions are better focused elsewhere. If and when he expresses interest again, maybe you won’t even feel the same way you do now?

        • jlyndby@lemmy.worldOPEnglish
          1·
          3 days ago

          I don’t know, this whole thing is just a trainwreck. If he does message me to hang out I might say yes because I’m lonely but I know I shouldn’t and he doesn’t have what I need