• phx@lemmy.ca
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    12
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    7 hours ago

    His undergarments settled gracefully about his ankles, revealing his manly glory. Like a Sphinx-Cat it stood proudly with its head held high above the two shaven and wrinkled spheres that adorned it.

    • nightofmichelinstars@sopuli.xyz
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      6 hours ago

      As he walked to the stove and reached for his favorite lace- adorned apron, he stumbled, not for the first time that day or even that hour, over the flacid, garden hose-like cock that dragged on the floor behind him between his legs. It was as thick as his powerful forearms and twice as veiny, and tended to slap around his ankles when he walked too fast.

      Usually he had to thread it through one pant leg or the other, and then wrap it around his calf a few times and stuff the end into his boot to keep from dirtying it outside, so when he was home it was a relief to let it whip around freely. Sometimes, when he stood at the stove for many hours and it pulled heavily at his taint, he would drape it around his neck like a feather boa, and feel pretty.

  • Maiq@lemy.lol
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    9 hours ago

    I feel personally attacked, how does he know exactly what by balls look like and how I feel about their aged inadequacies.

  • VaalaVasaVarde@sopuli.xyz
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    13 hours ago

    His mostly shaven ball sacks looked like the skin of a Shar-Pei dog, their eerie wobble mesmerized me like a deer caught in the headlights of a 1982 GMC Vandura…

  • Pilon23
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    15 hours ago

    Don’t leave us on a cliffhanger. I need to know what happened to this man’s balls

    • qarbone@lemmy.world
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      13 hours ago

      He shouldn’t go down the stairs with his balls while angry. Increased torsion risk

  • Lustrate@lemm.ee
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    17 hours ago

    They do, in fact.

    Time to introduce some people to the “Romantasy” genre it seems!