Setting boundaries with him, and with yourself, to ensure you have an out if he’s being hurtful is super important. If you just accept the comments he’ll have no reason to stop, especially if the behavior you exhibit afterwards is beneficial to him. An example would be: let him know that when he says hurtful things to you, you won’t be engaging with him in that frame of mind and that you will exit the situation until you feel safe and he’s able to speak kindly again. Then, the next time he does it, stop him, remind him of that boundary, get up, and exit the situation. If he tries to stop you or gets upset that you have expectations of being treated with respect, I suggest ending the relationship. If he catches himself, realizes when he’s getting worked up and tries to stop the behavior once he realizes how it affects you, he’s probably a good one.

Claire__ Saffitz x Dessert Person

Baker/ pastry chef that makes all sorts of tasty treats. Content is largely educational giving you tips and tricks on what she’s doing and why so you can replicate her recipe more easily.

Binging with Babish

Started out as one dude recreating food from films and shows and has expanded to having a dedicated anime food creator, doing fun food mashups for sports things, redoing episodes that he messed up on, and still doing food from films and shows.

I also want to build a solar punk community out in the woods!* (More concerned about building an ecological egalitarian community rather than it’s specific location but you get it) I’m in logistics and planning atm and my over all hope is to not just build a community, but to develop a blueprint for others to be able to more easily build their own with less initial cost/labor. Things like how to set up a community land trust, how to build net zero housing and which efficient appliances would work best off grid, how to find good properties that have enough natural resources to provide enough water for people and crops and animals (if you want animals) how practical tying into public utility grids would be at different locations/ distance, how to use gray water systems and composting toilets to reduce waste and reuse resources, composting and vermiculture, food storage and preservation, gardening techniques, what grants and credits and rebates are available for such project’s, how to build geothermal greenhouses, resources for open source tools and machines, community tool libraries, frameworks for egalitarian community decision making, ways to structure different roles and tasks so people are responsible to each other without punishment being the go to assumption for failure. Ya know, stuff.

Because women aren’t objects to play for and win like a prize in a claw machine. They’re people who have thoughts and wants and desires and aren’t interested in being treated like an object to be possessed while they’re out having fun. If you walk up and you’re obviously looking to find something to be romantically interested in, and they want to get to know people like people before anything romantic, you’re not going to have any luck. Like a bunch of the other comments said, go find something that you enjoy doing and get to know the people there as humans. Talk about your shared interest, about your goals and wants and desires for your life outside of a romantic partner, and ask them about the same. Surprisingly, once you stop treating women like fresh meat on a savannah and actually try to get to know who they are as people, they stop being so freaked out and might actually be interested in getting to know you as a person.

I think there are a significant number of different ways that a large corporation could provide housing for medium-term employees besides purchasing single family homes. Purchasing small apartment buildings, like a fourplex, or purchasing an empty lot and putting manufactured homes on it creating more housing instead of taking the starter homes from normal families.

Like the other comments said, trust your body. If you felt like sex was a vigorous enough workout that you need a rest day, take a rest day but if not do do what feels best.

Various factors could affect the answer. Are you a uterus haver? Does sex hurt? If engaging in acrobatic sexual maneuvers, do you stretch before? How often do you have sex? How long are the sessions?

As a uterus haver with EDS, I find sex can put me out of commission for days if I’m not careful. I actually just switched to a gym with a pool so I can do zero gravity exercises if my joints are forked after being fucked.

At a time or total?

For me the school book short story that grabbed me was The Smallest Dragonboy by Anne McCaffrey. Not super scary, just sticky.

Played in the creek (pronounced crik), caught pollywogs and toads and snakes. Walked barefoot to the farm down the street to buy sweet corn. Heard stories about my uncles finding dynamite in a cave near the railroad and bringing it home and passing it around at school before the fire department confiscated it all as well as stories of my great grandma holding my great grandpa at shotgun point till he did the chore he’d said he’d get to months before. I remember the internet screaming at me when I picked up the home phone. My dad’s first cell phone was a Nokia brick. The first Galaxy smart phone came out the year I graduated highschool.

https://www.homedepot.com/p/Owens-Corning-R13-Thermafiber-Fire-and-Sound-Guard-Plus-Mineral-Wool-Insulation-Batt-15-in-x-47-in-1310109/319880476

This is the kind of thing I would suggest, it’s designed to be soundproofing, fire retardant home insulation. This is literally the exact thing you would put in-between your joists before drywall if you were trying to insulate an interior wall for sound.

There’s a product called green fiber that is a blown-in cellulose insulation that’s been treated with fire retardant you could use if the walls have already been drywalled, I’ve used that in all of the interior walls of my home when I was remodeling to try and deaden sound and have added privacy throughout the home. My basement, which I turned into a mother-in-law apartment, is so private I can’t hear my basement neighbor when they have their video games blasting through a surround sound stereo set with a subwoofer. I can feel the floor shake but, unless I am standing right next to a vent, I can’t hear anything.

I stopped being so upset by it once I started examining social systems and propaganda. If you’ve been conditioned your whole life to think of women as weaker and smaller and someone to be protected to maintain your “manly state”, someone who doesn’t fit that mold is a threat to your subconscious sense of self worth. Same for women who don’t want to date shorter men, “if I’m not the property of someone who’s the biggest and the strongest, I’m worth less to this society.”
‘Society’ thinks men who are smaller than their woman are weak, and that the woman must be defective or she’d be with someone who ‘fits’ better. They’re dead wrong, but that’s the unexamined subconscious judgement that our society has conditioned into people. It’s easy to be less upset with individual people when you realize they just haven’t had the space to examine the abusive systems they’re forced to exist within.

Yay! I’m glad it helped. X) As to the faces, I use Gboard and there’s a ASCII art library in the list of emoji/gif options. It’s quite entertaining. (⁠_{⁠￣⁠³⁠￣⁠)⁠} ⊂⁠(⁠・⁠﹏⁠・⁠⊂⁠) ᕦ⁠(⁠ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ⁠)⁠ᕤ (⁠ノ⁠｀⁠Д⁠´⁠)⁠ノ⁠彡⁠┻⁠━⁠┻

TLDR: be happy to be alone, truly and genuinely. then it won’t matter if you find a partner, but you will be able to choose them with a clear mind if you do.

I’m basically a complete flip of you physically but I had the same problem for a loooooooooong time. I’m a tall, strong, heavy woman, and all i kept hearing was “you’re beautiful, I just don’t want someone taller/stronger/heavier than me”. I totally get it, I didn’t want to be taller/stronger/heavier than my partner either. But I’m like Fezzik- “it’s not my fault I’m the biggest and the strongest, I don’t even exercise”. except I did do cardio to try to slim down, I’m just built to survive famine I guess. ¯⁠\⁠(⁠◉⁠‿⁠◉⁠)⁠/⁠¯

What I didn’t understand was the ones who said they just wanted to be friends, because i just wasn’t their type, but would happily be fuck buddies, so long as we kept it hush hush. ಠ⁠ಗ⁠ಠ

Anyway, eventually after a bunch of very bad attempts at relationships where I took way more BS than I should have because I was just that hungry for affection, I decided I was just better off being single forever. I couldn’t seem to find a decent person who was attracted to me both physically and intellectually, so I decided to just stop looking. Not just stop looking, stop wanting. I actively wanted to be single for the rest of my life, in large part because I was just tired of the pain of being lonely. Like, “Jesus titty fucking Christ, we’re gonna cry ourselves to sleep because we’re SOOOO sad we’re alone AGAIN?! FFS, JUST STAHP!” So I stopped wanting a partner. I found I had so much more time and energy to do the things I was passionate about when I wasn’t futzing with all that stuff. I became the queen of getting shit done, remodeled my house myself, landscaped my yard, built a garden, went to the gym regularly, did weight lifting till I maxed out all the leg machines at the gym, and got close to maxing some of the upper body ones too. I was happy being single. I WANTED to be single. I craved my free time, the peace i found in solitude was better by orders of magnitude than any of the toxic relationships I’d clung to in the past.

After about two and a half years of that, a long time friend/ acquaintance started coming to me for massage ( I’m a deep tissue massage therapist with a focus on injury recovery and pain relief) and we would just talk throughout the sessions. Politics, philosophy, movies, anime, music, goals, food… Just everything. Eventually, after we’d just spent two more hours talking in the car after the two hours talking in the session, he said “Sooo… you know I’m flirting with you sometimes, right?” I turned him down. I said, more or less, “I’m happy single, I’ve had such a garbage time dating that I can’t pretend I’m not a decent part of the problem. I value our friendship and don’t want to hurt your feelings, and I’m not NOT attracted to you, I just don’t want to date ever again.” He was completely chill, said “no worries, no is no even if you’re attracted to me too. if you ever change your mind, let me know.” And he dropped it, never brought it up again… And fuck if that wasn’t the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen. We kept being friends and talking and spending time together, talking about goals and wants and life plans and we found that our wants and goals in life were so in line it was uncanny. Importantly, neither of us wanted to get married, neither of us wanted kids, neither of us wanted to live with a partner ever again… It seemed like I could keep my peace, my space, my autonomy, AND have a partner who cared about my mind and emotions while also finding me wildly attractive. So we talked about what dating would look like and agreed to try it. It’s been 2.5 years so far and I’ve never been happier in a relationship. I still think if we stopped being romantically involved I’d probably prefer to go back to staying single, but I’m happy with him as a partner.

I tell you the whole story, kinda long and rambling as it is, because I don’t think I could have found a happy relationship if I had continued to want one with the same frantic energy as I had previously. I don’t think I would have been a person who could be as open and honest as I was with who I was if I’d still wanted a partner when we started to really get to know each other. I don’t think I was a whole person when I was looking for my “other half” and I don’t know if you can really find a good match if you’re not a whole entire person on your own. If I could distill the idea down to it’s core, I think it would be: be happy to be alone, truly and genuinely. then it won’t matter if you find a partner, but you will be able to choose them with a clear mind if you do.

Samsies and samsies. Mortgage free farm in a quiet town with a evil corporation to screw over? Hell yeah.

It’s not my favorite. It does mean I prefer to not be a couch potato. Sitting still and playing video games all day hurts so much worse than gardening or cleaning the house.

EDS? That’s why I hurt when I sit still too long, my joints literally slide out of place without muscle activation to hold them steady

Crunchy peanut butter and low sugar strawberry jam (it’s more tart is all, DGAF about the sugar content) mixed together, use as a dip for pretzels. Only done it with crunchy pretzels but might be fire with fresh hot pretzels.

Hi Utah!

Thanks!