• Littleborat@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    There has to be some (dis)incentive to have children without marriage in some contries and not others.

    I Germany I guess people think you might as well marry when having children because you get extra money, less taxes whatever and maybe that’s not the case in other countries.

      • barsoap@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Marriage is a civil institution in Germany. A church marrying you has exactly as much legal power as a random citizen doing it: None. You get married at the civil registry office, by a bureaucrat (but yes they’re amenable to some mild ceremony)

    • XM34@feddit.de
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      1 year ago

      Another very important factor is that in Germany it’s extremely difficult to become the official father of a child when you’re not married to the mother. This obviously comes with a lot of problems. For example when the mother suffers complications during birth. It’s just way easier to marry instead of doing all of that paperwork.

    • severien@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Yeah, in Germany you get tax benefits under certain circumstances when married. In many other countries (e.g. Austria), marriage makes no difference. That’s already a strong motivator.

  • silvercove@lemdro.id
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    1 year ago

    In Germany there are massive tax advantages to getting married. That is why a lot of people get married in late December of each year.

        • snaptastic@beehaw.org
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          1 year ago

          That only makes sense if you assume that marriage is a purely financial thing. It has lots of other aspects that have nothing to do with money that a lot of people dislike.

        • ThorCroix@feddit.de
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          1 year ago

          It is a discrimination since not everyone will find somebody to marry. And even if everybody could marry, it still is a discrimination towards not married people.

          Marring for the purpose to get tax benefit and oder advantages is a sign of discrimination, because they are marring to get advantages in society.

          Society is full of discriminations that people have normalised and so they don’t see it as such.

  • magikmw@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    Can we get another map about inceptions out of mariage? Many marry only after learning they will be parents.

    • Neato@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      Mis-reporting or not reporting births, probably. That’s far too low to be realistic.

    • kernelPanic@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      Turkish here! The reasons are the fact that we are poor as fuck to finace a newborn baby and the financial incentives of marrying. When you marry usually the tradition is like the bride side funds the ceremony and groom’s side funds the house goods like dish washer, bed etc. You also get lotsa assets from your other relatives, colleagues, and friends. Moreover, both grandparents, being rich boomers, subsidise the cost of grandchild and take care of them. They wouldn’t do so if it was outside marriage because of old school mindset (herritage laws play a big role here too).

    • soviettaters@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      They’re Islamic and have traditional morals. it’s better for the kid if they’re married anyways.

    • Interesting_Test_814@jlai.lu
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      1 year ago

      This is not what I would have expected given the general tendency seems to be “eastern block = less”. Curious about why this is reversed in Germany (and Bulgaria apparently).

      • Rayleigh@feddit.de
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        1 year ago

        To be honest I dont get your comment. Can you maybe explain more? For me the distribution looks exactly like what I would have expected considering our history.

        • Interesting_Test_814@jlai.lu
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          1 year ago

          I mean looking at the other numbers on the map, the eastern countries generally seem to have much lower outside-marriage birth rates yet east Germany has higher rates than the west. I’d have expected closer numbers to e.g. Poland in east Germany and closer to France/Belgium/Netherlands in the west.

          • Rayleigh@feddit.de
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            1 year ago

            Yeah but Poland for example is very catholic traditionally. Also South and West Germany, while East Germany was more protestant. The socialist system in the GDR didn’t care much for religion or actively opposed it leaving todays east Germany then largely atheist. I think this plays a huge role. You’ll see the same divide looking at women working or children in kindergarten because east Germany favored a more progressive way of family and gender roles.

            • TheRex1209@feddit.de
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              1 year ago

              They didnt just ‘didnt Care much’, the goverment discriminated you If You believed in god. Examples i have Heard of is that If you wanted to Go to university or wanted a promotion they advised you to Stop practicing your religion.

              I don’t remember the exact Numbers, but about 80% were catholic after the war and about 15% were after Germany united again.

    • AggressivelyPassive@feddit.de
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      1 year ago

      Honestly, that still sounds very high. I’m in the prime birthing age and hardly anyone in my peer group is married, yet many have kids.

      That’s anecdotal, sure, but it also implies that there’s a huge population of married child bearers. Where are those?

  • Madster@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    That sounds wrong for Portugal. Couples who got married, had a kid and then divorced are fairly common, but born outside of marriage makes me struggle to even think of someone.

    • catarina@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      Your experience is not representative of the whole. I know a few single moms and many unmarried couples with children.

      • Madster@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Indeed, it isn’t. My job has me dealing with a ton of children of the area I live in (“Concelho”, as we call it), and most of them are still not born out of marriage, that’s why I am surprised. 60% seems very high.

    • spirinolas@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Couples who live together like they are married, with kids and all, but haven’t really put the pen to the paper, are more common than you think.

      The ones who stick together eventually make it official as a formality. But their kids technically are born out of wedlock.

      It even has a legal precedent as união de facto.

  • BobbyBoucher@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Well yeah. Weddings are expensive (relatively) and can be delayed. Having kids can only be delayed so much. People don’t have as much disposable in recent times so are choosing rather than both.

  • Kazumara@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    France is looking likeable. I wonder if this is another result of their system of Laïcité.

  • Lt. Worf, son of Mogh@lemmy.ca
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    1 year ago

    That’s so many kids growing up without married parents, and not even counting the ones that will divorce during their lifetime.

    I’m not religious or anything, but I worry about the stability of these households and what kind of life these kids will have.

    • AggressivelyPassive@feddit.de
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      1 year ago

      Exactly, it’s way better to have parents stay together in stable, forced marital bondage and hate each other more and more every day like god intended.

      Sure, dad cheats on mom, sometimes even beats her, and mom is secretly a depressive alcoholic, but separation would be superduper bad for the child!

      • silvercove@lemdro.id
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        1 year ago

        Why are so many people marrying people they hate? Isn’t that the real problem?

        • AggressivelyPassive@feddit.de
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          1 year ago

          They don’t marry people they hate, they just grow apart and since marriage forces them to stay together, they’re essentially trapped with a person they don’t want to be in a relationship with anymore.

          A normal couple would simply break up, but divorce is much harder.

        • doggle@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 year ago

          A lot of the time because they get pregnant and it’s not socially acceptable where they live to have a kid by someone you’re not married to.

    • IWantToFuckSpez@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      You know people can live happily together without being married right? Marriage is not a indicator of a stable household. Also many couples are in a civil union after the kid is born.

      Also guess which country UNICEF says where the children are the happiest and is the best place to raise kids? It ain’t Turkey or Belarus. It’s the Netherlands. All those Dutch bastards live very happy lives.

      • nodimetotie@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Not sure if they meant strictly marriage or civil partnership. Also you can’t claim causal relationship here (not being married implies happier kids), many other confounding factors are at play, like Econ development. Plus don’t forget that some of the happiest countries also have some of the highest suicide rates.

        • IWantToFuckSpez@kbin.social
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          1 year ago

          Exactly. The person above made the reverse causal claim that kids born in unmarried families will be miserable. There is no direct correlation.

          • nodimetotie@lemmy.world
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            1 year ago

            I wonder if there is any research about the relationship between full families and kids’ development

            Btw, love your user name!

    • Jakylla@sh.itjust.works
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      1 year ago

      In France (at least), there are different couple statuses recognized, one of them is Marriage, but another that is common nowadays is “PACS” (some kind of non-religious recognized union between two persons), that PACS accounts (since 2019) for around half of all unions of French couple (whatever the sex of both by the way)

      The data may not count for these others kind of recognized unions, and only account for that Catholic union

      Actually, I don’t know well, but I’m not even sure that Marriage is for all religions, there may be people “married” according to their religion, but not technically Married according to catholic/state rules

      • Interesting_Test_814@jlai.lu
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        1 year ago

        The data may not count for these others kind of recognized unions, and only account for that Catholic union

        Well the legend of the map says “% of live births outside marriage or civil partnership”.

        • Jakylla@sh.itjust.works
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          1 year ago

          The map yes, but the data source not really

          For France again, only information is that the percentage is sourced “From Civil Status”, and I don’t know if this “Civil status” account for marriage only or others unions also. Only source I’ve found on Insee (French civil status public data) accounts only for civil Marriage, and not for other unions: https://www.insee.fr/fr/statistiques/6524902?sommaire=6524912#dictionnaire

          SITU_MATRI : Situation matrimoniale des parents (Status of parents)

          • DM : Enfants nés dans le mariage (Children are born within Marriage)
          • HM : Enfants nés hors mariage (Children are born outside Marriage)
          • ENS : Ensemble (some children born within and some outside marriage)
    • eskimofry@lemmy.ml
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      1 year ago

      Marriage is not an indicator of a good childhood. Its better not to grow up in the presence of constant parental arguments and drama. Not to mentiom the emotional drain and loss of sleep or worse, timely happy moments missed because of a baf dad or mom is not worth saving marriages.

    • Chetzemoka@kbin.social
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      1 year ago

      This is just births. There’s no commentary on whether or not these parents get married after a child is born, but I’m willing to bet a fair percentage of them do. Also, just being unmarried isn’t an indicator of having two separate households. There are people in stable, monogamous relationships who never get married.

    • SkyeStarfall@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      1 year ago

      Marriage is just a social structure. Just because a couple isn’t married doesn’t mean they don’t have a stable household.