I just googled, ‘how to make Danish people like you.’ Any tip is highly appreciated.

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The original was posted on /r/denmark by /u/pamonhas at 2023-12-09 01:34:33+00:00. Original Title: I’m going to Denmark for the first time in my life, and I have to work with a Danish team doing something quite stressful. What should/shouldn’t I do to make a good impression, and maybe-even-hopefully, friends?

  • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
    1·
    2 years ago

    quantum-fitness at 2023-12-09 16:46:30+00:00 ID: kcnfjum

    If you want to make friends with them you likely need to geg drunk with them else you have to work on it for long.

  • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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    2 years ago

    DinglebearTheGreat at 2023-12-09 01:52:47+00:00 ID: kckxnty

    Probably start by not stressing . Workplace stress is not very welcomed in DK .

    • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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      2 years ago

      pamonhas (OP) at 2023-12-09 16:43:05+00:00 ID: kcnezv0

      Impossible. It’s an inherently chaotic and stressful line of work that involves 16+ hr days. I do happen to be working with one of the best professionals in the world though, who happen to be Danish. So I’m in good hands.

      • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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        2 years ago

        DinglebearTheGreat at 2023-12-09 18:28:20+00:00 ID: kcnvt29

        My point is that Danes typically have better work life balance than in other countries even if there is a lot of work to do so don’t stress . Don’t stress is the advice .

    • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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      2 years ago

      KinkyAndABitFreaky at 2023-12-09 07:29:01+00:00 ID: kclw48w

      That’s about as helpful as telling someone having a panic attack to not panic 😂

  • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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    2 years ago

    Vic2ria at 2023-12-09 06:22:21+00:00 ID: kclqu9i

    Don’t lie through your teeth. Be as genuine as you feel you can be, but bear in mind Danes take a little bit to warm up to you - that’s not you doing anything wrong!

  • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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    2 years ago

    jobsurfer at 2023-12-09 04:04:03+00:00 ID: kcldfaz

    Read up on the laws of Jante

    The Law of Jante (Janteloven in Danish) is a concept in Scandinavian culture that is often used to describe an attitude towards individual success and achievement common in Denmark and other Nordic countries. It is not an actual law, but rather a cultural norm. The concept was first articulated by Danish-Norwegian author Aksel Sandemose in his novel “A Fugitive Crosses His Tracks” (1933).

    The Law of Jante consists of a set of ten rules which essentially state that one should not think oneself special, or better than others. The rules focus on promoting community and equality over individual success and achievements. Here are the ten rules as originally outlined by Sandemose:

    1. You’re not to think you are anything special.
    2. You’re not to think you are as good as we are.
    3. You’re not to think you are smarter than we are.
    4. You’re not to convince yourself that you are better than we are.
    5. You’re not to think you know more than we do.
    6. You’re not to think you are more important than we are.
    7. You’re not to think you are good at anything.
    8. You’re not to laugh at us.
    9. You’re not to think anyone cares about you.
    10. You’re not to think you can teach us anything.

    These rules, while often criticized for promoting conformity and mediocrity, are also seen as fostering a sense of community, humility, and equality. The Law of Jante is a significant aspect of Scandinavian culture and has been a subject of much discussion and analysis.

    • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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      2 years ago

      Buller116 at 2023-12-09 08:09:24+00:00 ID: kclz49a

      I hate when foreigners says we live by the law of Jante, it’s even worse to here Danes say that we do. No we don’t. Maybe we are little bit humble but that’s about it.

    • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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      2 years ago

      pamonhas (OP) at 2023-12-09 16:49:59+00:00 ID: kcng3k2

      This is fascinating to me. I’m not American but I live in the US, and I had to learn the very opposite of these rules to thrive there. Very insightful. Thank you.

      • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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        2 years ago

        Aguyinatx at 2023-12-09 17:01:05+00:00 ID: kcnhvx5

        I am an American and you’re absolutely correct when you say that. It is as close to 180° as possible from the American work culture both in the bad things and the good.

      • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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        2 years ago

        Just_a_burrito at 2023-12-09 21:48:12+00:00 ID: kcos6al

        Honestly take the law of jante as seen here with a grain of salt, it’s not that extreme even if there is some truth to it. Mostly it’s a ‘you are not better than everyone else’ understood as that even if you are better at some things, there might be other things where you suck and the other person excels, so don’t brag or look down on others.

        That’s the way I have always understood it, and I find it to be a good way to remember to be humble 😊

  • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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    2 years ago

    InvertReverse at 2023-12-09 08:34:10+00:00 ID: kcm0wqj

    You’re allowed to make mistakes at work, but you have to own them. No one will think less of you for not being perfect, but will hate you if you don’t take responsibility.

  • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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    2 years ago

    boomgoesdadynomite at 2023-12-09 07:31:26+00:00 ID: kclwatc

    Lower your ambitions about making friends.

    If you do want to meet for a beer after work, you need to schedule it way in advance, like two or three weeks minimum.

    • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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      2 years ago

      pamonhas (OP) at 2023-12-09 16:53:08+00:00 ID: kcngm0z

      In my hone country, it’s customary for close friends to just show up at your house with no warning. I love how different cultures can be. I find it endlessly interesting.

  • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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    2 years ago

    beerbrewerdad at 2023-12-09 06:31:05+00:00 ID: kclrjvz

    Keep your appointments, be genuine, don’t brag but be realistic and honest, say your opinion but from a professional point of view and not your feelings.

    There well be cake - maybe alot. It’s quite ok to say no thanks. Same goes with alcholol at events outside of work. There will be alcohol.

    • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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      2 years ago

      pamonhas (OP) at 2023-12-09 16:38:09+00:00 ID: kcne7ob

      I happen to love cake and alcohol. Maybe I will fit in after all.

      • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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        2 years ago

        AccomplishedAd8286 at 2023-12-09 19:49:40+00:00 ID: kco97d7

        You are almost one of us, Please note we like marcipan in many cakes

      • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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        2 years ago

        beerbrewerdad at 2023-12-10 00:16:57+00:00 ID: kcpe5il

        Our culture is bound to alcohol. I personally love it, but please don’t feel pressured.

        It seems like you will be juuust fine

  • Dannebot@leddit.danmark.partyOPMBdansk
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    2 years ago

    sweet-dreams-R-us at 2023-12-09 06:27:51+00:00 ID: kclradw

    Bring cake and napkins. 🍰

    ESPECIALLY when it’s your birthday.

    Some cultures expects coworkers to organize the birthday cake for you, but it’s worth to mention it’s the other way round in Denmark. Put a 🇩🇰 on the cake but skip the candles when it’s not served privately in your own home.

    Also maintain your expectations regarding making Danish friends amongst a team where you know everyone will be really busy and stressful. They might need their time off to themselves and do something else than hang out with a work colleague who they just spent 8 hours with in the office. It’s not impossible to make Danish friends but it’s just not that easy, and I don’t want you to take it personal.

    Join recreational activities to meet people outside work - then you’ll also have something interesting to talk about with your coworkers that isn’t work related.