If someone spends more than 30 seconds loitering in my driveway, I get a picture message. If my garage door is opened I get a critical message. Then if my interior garage door is opened I get a different critical message.
If my garage door is left open for more then 30 minutes or any of my exterior doors are left open I get a message.
I get notifications when any particular user unlocks my front door and if someone fails to unlock it.
The only thing I have that’s online that pisses me off is my microwave. It has a big clock on the face. When I moved in I said there’s no fucking way I’m connecting that to the internet. Why invite trouble? So I went through its menuing system and I set the time. The next day it was off by a minute I figure oh I must have just caught it right at the end of the minute it’s probably just off a little bit. The next day it’s off by 2 minutes the next day just over 3 minutes. I go through the men used to see if there’s some way to disable the clock, there’s not. So I can either connect my microwave to the internet and let it get time, or forever have a wrong clock in my kitchen. The worst thing is it’s not even using NTP where I could just give it that port and call it a day, It pulls it’s time by making a black box SSL connection back to its mothership.
IT since the 90’s.
I have all those things and more, and 6 seperate VLAN’s with isolation, strong rules, alerting and honeypots in all the right places.
Just to be able to turn the washing machine without walking to it?
Most of my automations are practical.
If someone spends more than 30 seconds loitering in my driveway, I get a picture message. If my garage door is opened I get a critical message. Then if my interior garage door is opened I get a different critical message.
If my garage door is left open for more then 30 minutes or any of my exterior doors are left open I get a message.
I get notifications when any particular user unlocks my front door and if someone fails to unlock it.
The only thing I have that’s online that pisses me off is my microwave. It has a big clock on the face. When I moved in I said there’s no fucking way I’m connecting that to the internet. Why invite trouble? So I went through its menuing system and I set the time. The next day it was off by a minute I figure oh I must have just caught it right at the end of the minute it’s probably just off a little bit. The next day it’s off by 2 minutes the next day just over 3 minutes. I go through the men used to see if there’s some way to disable the clock, there’s not. So I can either connect my microwave to the internet and let it get time, or forever have a wrong clock in my kitchen. The worst thing is it’s not even using NTP where I could just give it that port and call it a day, It pulls it’s time by making a black box SSL connection back to its mothership.
What kind of microwave is it?
Whirlpool built-in, It’s a microwave over an electric oven. WOC75EC0HS
Manuals available at https://www.manua.ls/whirlpool/woc75ec0hs/manual
Oooh, fancy :D
You’d think. It came with the house during the appliance shortage. The font and click speed feels a lot like android gingerbread.
Oh no. Sounds a lot like one of those early “smart” TVs. Horribly expensive and slow as fuck lol