When i first heard the news, it felt surreal. But when that passed, i felt nothing.
I don’t really know what to do or feel. I saw her only a few days ago, and that was the first time i have saw her in years. She barely talked, she had alzheimers. She didn’t remember anyone. I remember as a child, seeing her handicapped but still able to have conversation and conscious.
I only have a few memories of her. It’s so vague, since those were when i was 6 or something. The only clear memory is of her yelling at me as a child. Or maybe not her, my memory is unreliable.
Half an hour later, it sunk in. She’s dead. I will never see her again. Just… I don’t know. I’m so confused. I’m a little teary eyed but the rest is just static. What of it? What do i expect to gain from this post? I don’t know. I just wanted to tell someone. I just feel like shit.
Very sorry for your loss, friend. Agreed with the other reply that said there is no wrong way to feel. Grief and loss are complicated things. I lost my grandma a couple years ago and I remember feeling nothing when I first heard the news and then while watching TV with my wife I suddenly broke down crying out of nowhere. Ten minutes later I was cracking up on the phone with my mom reminiscing. It’s a complex and messy process, but it’s worth letting yourself feel everything through it.
My sincerest condolences!
Thank you, and i’m sorry to hear about your grandma. If i lost a grandparent of mine, i would lose my mind. I love them all more than anything, and i’m not sure if i would recover from it. It’s still inevitable, though. That’s life.